No College for This Guy

Cherie Bennett
Thu, 20 Oct 2011 00:00:00 -0700
Lifestyle

Hey, Cherie!

I'm a guy who is in his senior year in high school. I play basketball and football. I swim. I get good grades and a very good GPA. I try to be a good brother to my younger siblings. I don't even really hang out with my friends all the time, and I like being at home playing online video games with my buds.

The thing is, I don't know if I want to go to college. In my family, it is not even up for discussion whether or not I am going to college. I just have to choose which college I will attend. I have never even been asked if I wanted to go, just where I want to go. I feel like I have put in my time the last 12 years of school, and if I don't want to go, then I shouldn't have to.
Updated: Wed Oct 19, 2011

Hey, Cherie!

I'm a guy who is in his senior year in high school. I play basketball and football. I swim. I get good grades and a very good GPA. I try to be a good brother to my younger siblings. I don't even really hang out with my friends all the time, and I like being at home playing online video games with my buds.

The thing is, I don't know if I want to go to college. In my family, it is not even up for discussion whether or not I am going to college. I just have to choose which college I will attend. I have never even been asked if I wanted to go, just where I want to go. I feel like I have put in my time the last 12 years of school, and if I don't want to go, then I shouldn't have to.

My parents both went to college, and my dad is a doctor, so obviously he continued for like another 8 years. My grandfather was a doctor, too. Even before I was born, it was decided that I was going to be a doctor. Well, I went along with it, and I took the science classes and did the best I could, which wasn't bad. I always said I wanted to be a doctor to make my family happy when it wasn't really an issue. Now I am supposed to apply to colleges and major in pre med. I feel like I have no say in my own life and I am 18 years old.

—Say No to College

Hey, Say!

It sounds like you have a very busy life! Doing so many things and being the person your parents expect you to be must be kind of hard to do all of the time. As a parent, I know that you can have big dreams attached to your children. We always want what's best for them, and we think we know what is best for them.

Your parents see your potential from the first step you take on your own. But it is your life, and you do have every right to study, or not study what you want. At first, your parents may be disappointed in your decision, but it is your decision to make. If you can calmly have a discussion with them and suggest maybe taking a year off to travel or work or volunteer with Americorp, then they will see that you are thinking about your future. It certainly isn't written anywhere that you have to go straight to college after high school, and your folks will understand your side better if you explain your reasons.

Hey, Cherie!

I need your help! I have to give a few speeches in front of my class this year. I am scared to death! I have nightmares about forgetting every word, barfing or something even worse. I talked to my parents, and they said to practice in front of them and in the mirror. That just makes me sick to my stomach. No help at all! What should I do?

—Speechless

Hey, Speechless!

Invite your friends over and practice in front of them. Maybe one of them can videotape you, and then you can see that it's not so scary to see yourself up there, and you can get some real feedback. Your teacher isn't expecting you to be a professional, just that you put some thought and practice into it. Good Luck!